Bohemia Village Voice

The Life of the Very Posh and Very Expensive Cigarette

As Lady Penelope sat down at her especially reserved table in the Savoy where she goes every morning, she ordered her tea and croissants and thought she would have a few puffs of a cigarette.
She elegantly reached into her small Macy’s purse and pulled out her very posh and very expensive cigarette. She placed it into her long red cigarette-holder and lit it carefully with her dazzling turquoise lighter. She took two big puffs and realized she had to be somewhere. She quickly stubbed out her hardly-used cigarette and rushed off.
As the waiter came to clear Penelope’s table, he couldn’t help but notice the hardly-used posh cigarette just lying there on the edge of the ash tray. He quickly picked it up and put it into his pocket. Later that day, he went to his father’s house and decided to give the very posh and very expensive cigarette to him. His father was a heavy smoker and loved smoking – however he couldn’t afford nice cigarettes.
The next day, the waiter’s father went out for a walk for some fresh air and as he was walking, he realized that he had the cigarette that his son gave him in his pocket.
He pulled it out along with his lighter and lit it carefully, like it was as precious and beautiful as the crown jewels. He took one huge puff and smiled. He liked it so much that he had to take another. The cigarette was beginning to get smaller and smaller, however he treasured every breath he took. All of a sudden he started to feel a sharp pain in his chest, then he became dizzy and his vision became impaired. He collapsed to the ground with a large thump and cracked his head on the curb.
Luckily, nearby there was a middle-aged homeless man. He found the old man and felt his pulse, but there was no movement. He searched in the man’s pockets for a phone and dialled 999. He knew it was too late – however he couldn’t just leave him. As he heard the ambulance arriving he quickly put the old man back how he found him and left in a hurry, due to embarrassment. If he stayed, he was frightened he would be accused of his death.
As the ambulance took the old man away the tramp came back. He looked on the floor and there, just lying on the pavement with a lighter next to it, was the very posh and very expensive cigarette. He picked it up and lit it. He took two puffs and the cigarette was gone. Although it didn’t last long, the tramp was still happy that he had the chance to try such a pricy object that he could never afford in his lifetime. The tramp later fell asleep and that evening the street cleaner came along and swept up what was left of the very posh and very expensive cigarette.