Bohemia Village Voice

Diane in 1968, with shopping mall Santa

Thanksgiving & Christmas

(for the unabridged version see below)

THANKSGIVING is a big family gathering day with lots of food, about a month before Christmas. I doubt that the Pilgrims would approve of the day being the massive pig-out festival it is. I make the turkey, stuffing, cranberries, string beans and rice or potatoes. I also do a few pies for dessert. These usually include an apple, pumpkin, and non-traditional chocolate pudding pie. The day after Thanksgiving is known as “Black Friday,” which is the biggest shopping day of the season. It’s when the stores go into “the black” and turn a profit. Merchants offer one-day big sales and open doors at 5am. Some people camp out all night long. We live in an area where the population is ethnically more mixed. There are a lot of Italians on Long Island and for them Christmas Eve is celebrated with a dinner consisting of seven different types of fish. The fish markets in the area are very busy the days leading up to Christmas Eve. I married into a German family and I used to bake a gingerbread house and the kids would decorate it.  We would also make tons of cookies that might include spritz, cardamon, Viennese crescents, snickerdoodles and lots of jam-filled cookies. Christmas music was German. Many schools and offices celebrate the Jewish Chanukah.
During December, most of the malls have Santa centers in them where you can have your child’s picture taken with Santa, which was something my mother did with me every year (picture). The weekend before Christmas is usually when we get our Christmas tree. We purchase a real tree from the local Episcopal Church that sells them as a fundraiser. I love at the end of the evening sitting by the tree and having a cordial right before bed. We had our big dinner either on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. My mother liked to have a ham at Christmas. At the end of the meal, my parents, who never drank during the year, would each have a glass of Drambuie, from a bottle they must have had for many years. The day after Christmas is an ordinary day here. Most of us go right back to work and that’s just fine with me!

Unabridged Version

One of the difficulties with Christmas is that it follows, about a month later, one of our other big holidays, namely Thanksgiving. I’m sure people in Europe are familiar with our Thanksgiving holiday and how it is a big family gathering day with lots of food. Unlike my mother, I don’t cook all the traditional dishes.

I highly doubt that the Pilgrims, being the conservative people they were, would approve of the day being turned into the massive pig-out festival it has become. Trying not to be too wasteful, I only cook what I think people will really want and eat. The traditional dishes such as mashed sweet potatoes with marshmallows, creamed onions, and turnips I don’t bother with. I just make the turkey, stuffing, cranberries, string beans and rice or potatoes. It is common for people to serve a Beaujolais Nouveau wine at Thanksgiving dinner because the timing of the holiday and the wine is perfect. I also make a few pies for dessert. These usually include an apple, pumpkin, and a non-traditional chocolate pudding pie. When Thanksgiving is done, that is when Americans seriously start thinking about Christmas, even if the advertisements for Christmas shopping may have begun much earlier.

The day after Thanksgiving is known as “Black Friday,” which is the biggest shopping day of the season. It is called Black Friday because the stores will go into “the black” and turn a profit on that day. Although the Friday after Thanksgiving isn’t a holiday, many people take that day off from work because it gives them a nice break (Thursday–Sunday). In order to attract people to their stores, merchants on “Black Friday” will offer one day big sales and open their doors early, usually at 5:00am. Because most of the deals are advertised as “only while supplies last,” some people will eat their Thanksgiving dinner and then go camp out all night long in front of a store, waiting for it to open. Last year, at a Walmart here on Long Island, an employee was stampeded to death when opening the store’s doors at 5:00 am to shoppers that had been waiting all night outside the store to purchase televisions that were advertised at a very low price and as only available in a limited quantity. That unfortunate event put new meaning in the phrase “Black Friday.”

The shopping aspect of the holidays here might not always be civilized, but there are aspects of the holiday that aren’t so frightful. Because we live in an area of the country where the population is ethnically more mixed than in other areas of the United States, we don’t all celebrate Christmas the same way. For example, there are a lot of Italians on Long Island and for them Christmas Eve is celebrated with a dinner consisting of seven different types of fish. The fish markets in the area are very busy the days leading up to Christmas Eve. All of my Italian friends had to spend Christmas Eve with their families. I don’t know if it was because their families required them to, or if the feast of fish was such a gourmet treat that they didn’t want to miss it.

As far as my customs go, I married into a German family that loves to bake and Christmas was a showcase for their talents. When the stepchildren were very young, I would bake a gingerbread house and the kids would decorate it. Because they would do such a beautiful job, or at least I thought so, I couldn’t toss the house out and I’d hold on to it until the summer humidity brought it down. We would also make tons of cookies that might include spritz, cardamon, Viennese crescents, snickerdoodles and lots jam filled cookies. My husband would make the stollen and any of the baked goods that required more of the real German baking skills that he had. Our Christmas music in the house was German, but once in a while we’d play a Christmas album for the kids such as the Veggie Tales Christmas, just for a change of pace.

Since December is also the month Jews celebrate Chanukah, many schools or offices celebrate Christmas, Chanukah and even Kwanzaa all together with “holiday parties” and they keep decorations to just a wintry theme. A significant number of towns in our area will have both Christmas tree and Menorah lighting ceremonies. Holiday decorating can get a bit complicated and controversial for public institutions. At one library I worked at years ago, the director decided she was no longer decorating the library at all during the holiday season, because no matter what she did people complained about it. If she had Christmas and Chanukah decorations people complained that it was too religious for a public building, or that one holiday was represented more than the other. If she decorated with just a wintry seasonal theme people would complain that there were no Christmas and Chanukah decorations. For this reason, she decided it was better not to deal with it at all.

During December, there are always a lot of activities for children. Most of the malls have Santa centers in them where you can have your child’s picture taken with Santa, which was something my mother did with me every year. When my son and nephew were very young, my mom and I would take the boys to a garden center that during the Christmas season was transformed into a North Pole wonderland. They would have pictures with Santa and be able to see live reindeer in wooden pens, which I think I enjoyed seeing more than my son did.

The weekend before Christmas is usually when we get our Christmas tree. We purchase a real tree from the local Episcopal Church that sells them as a fundraiser. I love at the end of the evening sitting by the tree with the lights on and having a cordial right before bed. When I was young my family had an artificial tree that we used for at least a decade. And we always had the stockings strung along the fireplace. We had our big dinner either on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day (some years my father had to work on Christmas Day). My mother liked to have a ham on Christmas, but if my Aunt Shirley and Uncle Andy were coming, Mom would have a turkey instead, since Aunt Shirley was Jewish. The dinner was a big deal and even the table setting had to be perfect. At the end of the Christmas meal, my parents, who never drank during the year, would each have a glass of Drambuie, from a bottle they must have had for many years. I don’t have the kind of Christmas dinners my mother had, and I certainly don’t set a fancy table, and a bottle of Drambuie (a small bottle) around here might just last one or two Christmases.

The day after Christmas is an ordinary day here. Most of us just go back to work. There are some people who like to hit the stores again for the after Christmas bargains. There are also some Italian families that exchange presents again on the feast of the Epiphany, but for most of us it’s all over after December 25^th, and that’s just fine with me. Every year I think that something special or magical will happen during this season, but it never does, and I find myself happy when the hectic holiday season has finally passed and life is back to normal.

Diane Haberstroh